Marriage for Millennials?

Increasingly, committed couples are forgoing marriage while saying “I do” to the various other trappings of adult relationships.

Unmarried couples made up 9% of homebuyers in 2021, according to the National Association of Realtors. In 2022, 42% of respondents on a massive survey said they want their next relationship to be their last, but when asked, “are you ready to settle down and get married right now?” 31% responded “no”. And over the last few years, 48% of daters have said they would consider having a child with a partner without being married.

“I really just never thought about marriage,” Ashley Dour, a New Jersey native, told the Post. “People are like, ‘Don’t you want the ring and the wedding?’ No, the last thing I want is to be center of attention and spend all this money on one big night. I want my money to go into my house.”

These are scenarios that are increasingly common of the trends. But be cautioned that unmarried couples should still take some steps to make it legal. Allen Drexel, a partner in the New York City matrimonial and family law firm Gallet Dreyer & Berkey urges couples, “What I strongly urge them to do, particularly if there are substantial assets and earnings involved, is to have a comprehensive agreement contract or a co-habitation agreement on things like ‘who’s going to contribute how much toward what expenses’ ranging from rent or mortgage payments, maintenance, insurance, utilities, and food.”

Having a joint bank account to pay the mortgage and living costs, and for a share investment account, although maintain their own separate savings has been a successful way to manage finances.

“We saw [some of our friends] get married, and they quit trying because marriage felt like it was a guarantee that you’re going to be there. We hated that,” Dour said. A fear of divorce made them hesitant to marry, “The biggest reason that we never got married is because I was really afraid of him not being in my life permanently.”